Beer my friend, you have weighted me down

Since the beginning of time beer has been a vital part of every civilization & consumed with great zeal. Sadly for my civilization & me personally was the invention of cameras. These devices have saved images of me when I was a much younger & slimmer man. I realize that our metabolism slows as we get older among other things, but it is my belief that beer or my love of said beer is directly responsible for my belly, double chin & fat face. Throughout our lives we must make commitments that prove we have willpower & giving up my dear friend cold beer for at least a month is one of those times. I jest that I don't have too many vices but beer is one of my favorites. I drink beer to unwind from a stressful day, as my social beverage of choice & let's be honest....I really enjoy it. My goal is to lose at least 35 lbs by the end of August & giving up coldies is the main component. I also have been green lighted by my Vanderbilt Hospital (shitty football team...great hospital) cardiologist to resume exercise & I am fine tuning my diet to jumpstart my metabolism. I am on Day 9 of the no beer plan & feeling good. Well, I gave myself a Sunday Funday beer waiver & to tell the truth; the 1st ones at the the Crow's Nest didn't taste very good. I chalked it up to the beer lines being dirty & headed to my Sunday honey hole...Brewhouse. It felt good to have a few 2 for 1 coldies until a storm rolled up in there & I had to exit stage left. I switched back to wine once I made it to the safety of the condo & woke up this morning feeling like ass. I've decided to continue on with the no beer diet through the summer & just see how much weight I lose & how much better I feel. I will institute the Sunday Funday waiver when necessary as it isn't cool to drink liquor when it is 90 plus degrees outside & 2 for 1. I was also just lucky enough to have a friend who is a waitress in the sky for United who is a sweetheart & brought me 5 VB(Victoria Bitter) beers & a tall voluptuous redhead from down under(Australia). I forgot to mention that we had to taste 2 of them Friday night...oops. I am excited about getting back into the pool & the gym....hopefully i will lose between 35-45lbs this summer & be able to fit back into some of my cool skinnier clothing. Until next time....
Cheers,
Rip Pewett